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How to Address a Coworker's Mistake Without Damaging the Relationship

  • drewh83
  • 1 day ago
  • 3 min read

Mistakes in the workplace are inevitable. If it hasn’t happened already, there will likely come a moment in your career when a coworker makes a noticeable error—and you’re left wondering whether to speak up or stay silent.


Ignoring the issue may feel easier in the moment, especially if you want to avoid discomfort or conflict. But silence often comes at a cost. Left unaddressed, small mistakes can turn into bigger problems, and in a management role, saving all feedback for a performance review can be ineffective and counterproductive.


According to workplace experts, one of the biggest differences between good managers and great ones is the ability to give constructive feedback in a way that supports growth. While pointing out a mistake can feel uncomfortable, failing to do so ultimately holds the individual—and the team—back. When mistakes go unacknowledged, learning stops.


The goal is not to criticize, but to correct, support, and move forward together.


Ideally, feedback should happen soon after the mistake occurs. Timely conversations help ensure the issue isn’t repeated, allow learning to happen in real time, and preserve trust and professional relationships.


Here’s how to approach the conversation thoughtfully and effectively.


Step 1: Don’t Address the Mistake While You’re Upset

Emotions matter. Addressing a mistake while you’re frustrated or angry almost guarantees a defensive response and a less productive outcome.


That doesn’t mean avoiding the conversation entirely—but it does mean waiting until you can approach it calmly and professionally. Everyone makes mistakes, and entering the discussion with perspective and empathy sets the tone for a constructive exchange.


If needed, take a short walk, listen to music, or give yourself time to reset. At the same time, don’t wait too long. Delaying feedback can make the conversation more awkward and increase stress for everyone involved.


And always handle these conversations privately. Respect and discretion go a long way.


Step 2: Assess the Situation Before Taking Action

Before initiating the conversation, take a moment to evaluate the mistake.


Ask yourself:

  • Was the error intentional or accidental?

  • Is this a one-time issue or part of a larger pattern?

  • How significant was the impact?


There’s a meaningful difference between a simple, human mistake and behavior that is intentional or harmful. In more serious cases, escalation or involvement from human resources may be necessary. In most situations, however, clarity and coaching are all that’s needed.


Step 3: Frame Feedback as Support, Not Criticism

Mistakes—especially public or high-impact ones—can leave people feeling embarrassed or isolated. That’s why it’s essential to approach the conversation from a place of support.


Let the person know you’re invested in their success. When feedback is delivered with genuine care, it encourages growth instead of defensiveness and reinforces the idea that you’re working toward the same goal.


Be direct, but stay humble. Acknowledge that you may not have the full picture. For example:

“Here’s what I noticed. I could be mistaken, and if I am, I’d appreciate your perspective. If not, I think it’s worth talking through how we can avoid this next time.”

You can also approach the situation with curiosity:

“I noticed part of the process was skipped. Was there a reason for that? Is there a way we could handle it more effectively moving forward?”

This keeps the conversation collaborative rather than confrontational.


Step 4: Be Specific About the Mistake and Its Impact

Vague feedback isn’t helpful. If you’re addressing a mistake, be clear about what happened and why it mattered.


Focus on the behavior—not the person. Make it clear that while the action was incorrect, it doesn’t define their character or abilities. Sharing your own experiences with similar mistakes can also help normalize the conversation.


Some experts recommend using the Situation–Behavior–Impact–Intent approach:

  • Situation: Describe when and where the issue occurred.

  • Behavior: State what you observed, sticking to facts rather than assumptions.

  • Impact: Explain how it affected the work, team, or outcome.

  • Intent: Ask questions to understand their perspective or goals at the time.

This framework encourages understanding while keeping the discussion grounded and productive.


Step 5: Reinforce Trust Through Action

Resolving the conversation is only part of the process—moving forward matters just as much.

For managers, this may mean giving the individual opportunities to demonstrate growth, take on new responsibilities, or rebuild confidence through action. Allowing room for improvement shows trust and reinforces accountability.


For peers, offering guidance, resources, or follow-up support can make a meaningful difference. If your coworker’s success matters to you, helping them improve benefits everyone.


At the end of the day, learning happens through experience, feedback, and the chance to apply lessons moving forward. Addressing mistakes with respect and intention strengthens teams—and builds better working relationships in the process.

 
 
 
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